Archive for September 12th, 2009

Hi its Ellen – had something of a quasi-tragedy at my place the other day – BOB (you all KNOW BOB) that is my very own Battery Operated Boyfriend – bit the dust!  Bought the farm – went to that vibrator heaven in the sky – hey maybe it used a white lighter and become one with the 27 Club who KNOWS – gave an odd shudder – emitted a faint aroma of burning electrical – and then played became just one more dead soldier.  But as they say LIFE goes on and so does Ellen.  Quick as you can say ‘CUM FUCK AUNTIE’ I was online and even as I type a NEW BOB – and a replacement – are winging their way to me via UPS, and as happy as my UPS man IS everytime he delivers to me – THIS time he’s in for the greeting of his life!

Now in the meantime poor Ellen has to make due with her fingers – and of course your help!  And let me tell you BOB is not my only external source of joy – but other than YOU it is my favorite.

Now really you must call me – lend a hand – so to speak -its so much better (with or without BOB) with YOU on the other end of the line.  Now give Auntie Ellen an assist – or be a GOOD boy and help Mama Ell out – call me – 1-888-319-9489.

One of my dear friends sent me this listing of the perfect woman, knowing him I’m sure he can come up with a few more requirements … like “O BABY YOUR DICK IS SOOOOOOOOOO BIG” lol when we know I can take it ALL right down my throat XOXOX

PHONE SEX LADIES DO IT ALL

CUM WHERE WE DO IT ALL – ANY FANTASY – NO MATTER HOW TWISTED YOU ARE!

WE ARE TOO XOXOX

TELL US SOME OF YOUR PERFECT LADY REQUIREMENTS

1-877-787-7961