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Archive for October, 2010

PostHeaderIcon PhoneSex Auntie Carol XoXoX

I got an email today that I just had to share with everyone .. it’s a little of subject and a slam to the lame thinking of a man .. so baby let this be a warning when you just aren’t thinking right.  Even though your trying feverishly to make the sweet gesture .. it’s just not!! LOL to damn funny ……… serious !! I’ve always said fact is better than fiction … Kudos to Ms Aaron

This is an “actual letter” from an Austin , Texas woman sent to Proctor and Gamble regarding one of their feminine products. She really gets rolling after the first paragraph. This was PC Magazine’s 2009 Editors’ Choice award-winner for the best letter sent via e-mail.

Dear Mr. Thatcher,

I have been a loyal user of your ‘Always’ maxi pads for over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I’d probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I’d certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts.

But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic I can’t tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there’s a little F-16 in my pants.

Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? I’m guessing you haven’t. Well, my time of the month is starting right now.  As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I’ll be transformed into what my husband likes to call ‘an inbred hillbilly with knife skills.’

Isn’t the human body amazing?

As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you’ve no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customer’s monthly visits from ‘Aunt Flo’. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it’s a tough time for most women.

The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants… Which brings me to the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: ‘Have a Happy Period.’

Happy Period

Are you f—— kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness – actual smiling, laughing happiness, is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James?  FYI, unless you’re some kind of sick S&M freak, there will never be anything ‘happy’ about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don’t march down to the local Walgreen’s armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.

For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn’t it make more sense to say something that’s actually pertinent, like ‘Put down the Hammer’ or ‘Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong’.

Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescendsation . And that’s a promise I will keep.

Always. . …

Wendi Aarons

*****************************************

So damn funny .. AND .. so damn true ……………. I just had to share XOXOXOX

Loves and kisses to you … XOXOX

Auntie Carol  1-877-516-8280

Auntie Carol ** Mighty FINE

Real phonesex by a Real Woman .. I’ll share all aspects of my life love, sex, family, lust, fun, role play .. baby you name it bizarre to the sensual … lust to the love

LET’S PLAY BABY … 1-877-516-8280

Might want to take a look at some of my favorite links  and blogs … follow me on twitter I might give you a special blow ;)

 

PostHeaderIcon Don’t argue with a women

You know it and we know it to argue with us or try to out smart us is just not realistic. ;-) Here is a joke I found funny and so true on how we can get our way.

A husband and wife take a long awaited vacation out in the woods. He anticipating great fishing her peace and quiet.

One morning, the husband returns the boat to their lakeside cottage after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap.

Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, puts her feet up, And begins to read her book. The peace and solitude are magnificent .

Along comes a Fish and Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says,

‘ Good morning , Ma’am. What are you doing?’

‘Reading a book,’ she replies, (thinking, ‘Isn’t that obvious?’)

‘You’re in a Restricted Fishing Area,’ he informs her.

‘I’m sorry, officer, but I’m not fishing. I’m reading.’

‘Yes, but I see you have all the equipment . For all I know you could start at any moment. I’ll have to take you in and write you up.’

‘If you do that, I’ll have to charge you with sexual assault,’ says the woman.

‘But I haven’t even touched you,’ says the Game Warden.

‘That’s true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment.’

‘Have a nice day ma’am,’ and he left.

I hope you got at least a small chuckle remember laughter is the best medicine. Also don’t forget studies say sex also is great for helping keep you healthy. So give us a call and we can have some laughs and make sure we keep your body healthy with plenty of strong Orgasms.

Amanda
http://www.extremetaboophonesex.com
1-877-694-5179
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